Time to Toss Some Makeup?
A 3 Minute Miracle decluttering project for your weekend.
The summer before I started high school my mom gave me a home perm. And I feel like you know how this story ends.
Why did I not only allow this to happen, but willingly participate in it? Because my mom was no stranger to drug store hair improvement solutions.
It may be true that hair perming was not something we had previously done in our house, but hair dyeing was happening on a monthly basis. And by hair dyeing, I mean hair "frosting."
My mom was a hair froster.
And I was her accomplice.
Meaning that I was the one pulling her hair through every third hole in that rubber cap so that she could slather on the bleach and emerge thirty minutes later, looking like she was a member of N'Sync.
And since I was so successful at transforming my mom into Lance Bass, surely she could perm me up like Justin Timberlake.
Except,
I’m not saying I spent the next 8 months smearing packages of Aussie 3 Minute Miracle all over my head, but I definitely was giving that hornet's nest a lot of attention.
Which brings me to something else that might need some attention: your makeup bag. Or shelf. Or drawer.
Much like the aftermath of that perm, some things just need to be cleaned up and Bye Bye Bye-ed.
Which is why I’m going to propose we undertake a little project this weekend.
Something we can do quickly and without having to take our winter clothes off and try our summer things on so we can see if we’re still willing to wear these flesh revealers out in public where the sun is shining its unforgiving light.
Makeup. We gotta go through it. And here’s what has to go:
Old and expired makeup. Check the expiration date on the packaging and if it looks funny or smells funny, do not put it on your face. Put it in the trash.
Also, makeup sponges that are over a month old, falling apart, or stinky.
Actually, a hard and fast rule I recommend embracing: When something you put on your face is stinky? It goes in the trash.
Not sure if your makeup is old or expired? I’ll drop some industry guidelines into the PS. Fair warning: they are 100% more dramatic and illuminating than eye brightening gel, which doesn’t seem to work on anyone whose under eye area actually needs to be brighter.
Anything that looks terrible on you. I know you’ve been trying to find the right shade of Taylor Swift’s red lipstick and I also know that you have 17 shades that are definitely not Taylor Swift’s red lipstick. Those need to go.
Also, that foundation that is too light or too dark or too … gray? Gone. We don't hang onto things that make us look … sort of … not so … alive?
Anything you’re not using. Like that giant eyeshadow palette with 48 colors you bought because it seemed like a great deal. Yet you’ve only ever used the brown (for work days) and the bright blue (for that one New Year’s Eve party). The rest? Unused and unwanted. Let it go. Accept that you are never going to wear yellow eyeshadow.
Anything that breaks you out. I don’t care if it has Vitamin C in it. I don’t care that you paid a lot of money for it. Dermatitis is not your destiny.
Junk. Stubby eye pencils, empty bottles, broken brushes, dirty wipes and crusty cotton balls can all go straight into the trash. We are not the kind of people who keep junk in our homes.
The best part of this project? Sorting out your makeup is quicker—and way less painful—than sorting out my home perm situation.
Also great? You get to be proactive in preventing a situation where you wake up one day with a patch of something on your chin that ain’t nothing but a heartache. Ain’t nothing but a mistake.
Plus, you get a makeup shelf that is fresh, organized, and full of things you trust. And use. And love.
Which is a different kind of 3 Minute Miracle, but not a bit less extraordinary.
Your annoying (but loveable) friend who can’t stop speaking in song lyrics,
Vivian
PS. If you were like: “Wait, ‘Ain’t nothing but a heartache’ is the Backstreet Boys and not N’Sync,” then I bet you have your own home perm story to tell. Please share it in the comments so we can commiserate.
PPS. I promised guidelines and here they are. Some of these? You’re not gonna like.
Liquid Foundation: Time to toss it after 6 months to 1 year.
Cream Foundation: Time to toss it after 6 months to 1 year.
Powder Foundation: Time to toss it after 2 years.
Cream Blush: Time to toss it after 1 year.
Powder Blush: Time to toss it after 2 years.
Makeup Blenders and Sponges: Time to toss it after 1 month. Or if it’s stinky or crusty or crumbling apart.
Liquid Eyeliner: Time to toss it after 3 months.
Pencil Eyeliner: Time to toss after 2 years. Or when it’s so stubby you can’t sharpen it.
Cream Eye Shadow: Time to toss it after 3-6 months.
Powder Eye Shadow: Time to toss after 1 year.
Mascara: Time to toss it after 3 months.
(Seriously! This 👆🏼 is the guideline. It seems quick, right? How old is the mascara you're currently using? Fess up in the comments! 100% you are not alone.)
Lipstick: Time to toss it after 1 year.
Lip Gloss: Time to toss it after 1 year.
I literally just did this during the week - cleared out the first aid box, bathroom cabinet and baskets of all the stuff that had leaked, was out of date or I just didn't think I'd ever use. Filled a shopping bag!
I did this not very long ago. However, I didn't actually throw away the eyeshadow palette. I threw it in with my watercolors. I'm going to try to paint a picture with it ...